That's a Wrap

 This year went by much faster than I anticipated.  My best laid plans all fell through as is typical for my best laid plans.  I did 'retire' in January.  I was back to work in May.  I had spent enough time 'visiting' all my peeps at the Pointe that the Executive Director just asked me if I wanted to come back to work part time.  I'm there anyway so I said yes and I worked all year.  Part time hour wise but not day wise.  I spent weeks and weeks working five and six days a week.  They finally hired another person and I get to do my schedule of two days a week (yeah right).

The blog had a good year even if it felt neglected a bit.  There were over 12.5k page views.  Seems like each year it grows.  The post with the most views this year was not a RIP, but the one about Mom and Dolores's keys. I don't have a set series of topics that I blog about so it is always interesting to see which ones hit. 

A quick recap of the year.  I spent almost a month in Indiana mid-January to mid-February. Within three days I knew I was not going to be spending six months of the year there.  I wasn't able to put my finger on it until the end of the year, but I knew something was way off in January.  I thought it was mental health issues and maybe that is right.  

I went back and forth to Indiana in the summer to transport the oldest grandkids out here for a visit individually.  That meant three trips there.  Two by plane and one by car.  Then things came to a head and I still did not know why.  So, no more trips to Indiana for this year.  

Pat and I went to the UK and had a great time.  We went on the Eye, drove a car on the wrong side of road, saw the Kelpies, walked a bit, rode trains and buses and stayed in a castle in Dublin.  It was fabulous. 

I also went to Vegas with Jodi and had a good time.  Always do and always do different things there.  This year we saw the mob museum.   

The last part of the year was rough. Cassie went bananas and forbade me from seeing or talking to the grandkids without supervision and then she took one phone away and blocked me on the other.  It was a whole thing, but she feels how she feels and that is all the matters in her world.  So, David and I worked out a system, but it still curtailed a lot of connection with the kids.  He didn't get it either, but it is easier to just do what she wants and he's had years of that training.  I got a good taste myself and for my mental health I let sleeping dogs lie.  Things usually have a way of working out.  The day before my boy's 14th birthday she got arrested for dealing narcotics.  And that explained a lot.  I got a call from DCS a few days later due to a warrant being served on the house and the kids were taken into service. This story ends the year with the four kids being placed with David's mom and they have moved into the house.  David moved out of the house.  And Cassie sits in jail.  The SW told me that Cassie admitted to using those narcotics for the past three years.  Damn.  Anyway, David is jumping through the hoops to get the kids back and I got my connection back.  They unblocked me on the blocked phone, and the other child got a new phone and number and texts me often.  I only briefly asked about their perception.  I'm not pushing anything right now.  They have enough on their plates just processing what has occurred so far.  Cassie ended up with more charges from the warrant served at the house so she may be looking at some serious time away.

And so, 2025 ends.  Looking forward to 2026.  Obviously, I am planning a trip to Indiana a little later.  Jodi and I are going to New Orleans in February.  And the rest of the year is wide open.  Hoping to be able to bring kids back here for a visit, but we may have to wait on that until that case concludes.  It is harder when you want to cross state lines to get permission.  

Oregon Grand Slam 1983

 I have been following a guy on social media named BlazakR.  A little while back he proposed an idea of before any conversation between liberals and conservatives happen, that the question be asked about the first concert the people attended.  The theory is to have a connection before the differences of opinion intrude.  Makes the conversation go better because you see each other as people first.  

Randy's first concert was the Beatles.  How cool is that?  I think he trumps my Queen.  Although I still think my Queen is pretty damn cool itself. Then he pointed out how we only remember the big things.  The out of the ordinary things. We don't remember what we had for dinner six weeks ago on a Tuesday, but if there was another incident that happens, we might because of the other incident.  

My brain jumps to the Oregon Grand Slam 1983 with Journey, Sammy Hagar, Bryan Adams and Sequel.  I don't even know who Sequel is/was.  I wasn't there for them.  The Grand Slam was held in the stadium in Eugene. I have to back up.  The week before that concert I got a flat tire.  My spare was then on the car, and my dad told me to get my tire fixed.  Can you guess where this is going? I did not get the tired fixed before the concert. 

I drove to Eugene with my two friends.  It was a hot day.  We had a blast at the concert. Decided to leave before the Journey encore so we could beat the traffic out.  We are in a city that we don't know.  The way the parking was we could only get out of the grass was if we went over the curb.  I made it over the curb and was then high centered.  Wait...what?  Got out and realized that the car was high centered and the spare tire was flat.  I know how to change a tire, but that knowledge doesn't do any good if the tire in the trunk is also flat.  There we are with a high centered car and two flat tires.  The concert ended and people left.  This is before cell phones, and I was a teen so no triple A. 

Along came Mike.  A guy from nowhere.  He asked if he could help.  Yes.  First things first.  The flat in the trunk needs to be fixed.  Turned out there was a gas station about a mile up the road.  Back then it wasn't just a gas station.  They could actually help you.  So, he and one of my friends rolled the flat tire all the way to the station and got it repaired.  It's like midnight now.  They rolled it back and I'm sure that was a lot easier than rolling it to the station. He jacked up the car and changed the flat tire with the repaired tire. The car was no longer high centered and we could go.  Turned out Mike was looking for a ride and how could we refuse after all that. As luck would have it, he was from Vancouver also.  We all made it home fine and I let him drive because I was exhausted by that time. We got home at like 3 in the morning.

I never told my dad about not fixing my flat.  Seriously what are the odds of having two flat tires in one week? I did not tell my dad about the guy who rescued us and then I let him drive my car.  The one rule was no one else drives the car. 

I also never got the tell the story because one of the friends who was with called out at work claiming we were stuck in Eugene until the morning because of the car situation and it was too late to get the tire fixed.  Totally ruined my story.  

This story probably would not happen today.  Society has changed and people don't trust each other. That night we were beyond grateful for Mike.  And it does make for a good story.  

We Don't Tell

 There was a concert at work the other day. A choir from the middle school and the band from the high school.  It was really really lovely.  I was greatly impressed by the band playing all the Christmas carols.  

After it was over I was in the dining room doing my job.  One of my resident friends came up and asked if I enjoyed the concert.  She said she did.  Told me how she played the clarinet in band and so did I.  I told how I quit band after I had a creepy teacher who I did not enjoy. He kind of took the joy out of the endeavor.  

My friend then proceeded to tell me about her band teacher giving her a ride that did not go as planned.  It wasn't quite a sexual assault, but it was close and definitely a testing of the waters.  She then told me of another time someone gave her a ride, and it would have been an assault, but she was able to grab him by his hair and didn't let go until he let her up.  When she was through with the story, she looked at me and said she has never told anyone about this in her entire life. She is in her 90s.  I just looked at her and said we don't tell.  Not at the time anyway.  

I think all women have some sort of me-too moment and we don't tell.  We are young, we are ashamed, we are scared.  I felt rather honored that she decided to share her story for the first time with me.  It started with a band concert. And ended with two women recognizing some truths we all hold.