We Don't Tell

 There was a concert at work the other day. A choir from the middle school and the band from the high school.  It was really really lovely.  I was greatly impressed by the band playing all the Christmas carols.  

After it was over I was in the dining room doing my job.  One of my resident friends came up and asked if I enjoyed the concert.  She said she did.  Told me how she played the clarinet in band and so did I.  I told how I quit band after I had a creepy teacher who I did not enjoy. He kind of took the joy out of the endeavor.  

My friend then proceeded to tell me about her band teacher giving her a ride that did not go as planned.  It wasn't quite a sexual assault, but it was close and definitely a testing of the waters.  She then told me of another time someone gave her a ride, and it would have been an assault, but she was able to grab him by his hair and didn't let go until he let her up.  When she was through with the story, she looked at me and said she has never told anyone about this in her entire life. She is in her 90s.  I just looked at her and said we don't tell.  Not at the time anyway.  

I think all women have some sort of me-too moment and we don't tell.  We are young, we are ashamed, we are scared.  I felt rather honored that she decided to share her story for the first time with me.  It started with a band concert. And ended with two women recognizing some truths we all hold.