Tesoro Los Cabos

 The hotel, Tesoro Los Cabos, is fabulous and huge.  I believe there is hotel, time-share and condos.  I know they were concerned that we stay in our area.  There are two operating restaurants and we get breakfast.  I didn't think we did unless we paid, but what a pleasant surprise.  One restaurant serves up a daily buffet and the other is order off the menu and all you want.  How cool is that? I doubt we could have found a better spot.  Great location and amenities.  Happy Pat ever found it in the first place.  

Cabo

 

Our day started very early.  We had to catch the 8 am plane to LA.  And then we had the long layover there.  Almost five hours.  Jodi and I did a long walk and it is a big airport.  Then the last hop to the airport just outside of Cabos San Lucas.  Due to circumstances, we were the last to get out of the terminal.  Our shuttle was not there but a representative was.  He was actually worried about us.  He had called the hotel to make sure we hadn't cancelled.  He called the driver and a shuttle arrived to take us to our hotel at the marina.  

By the time we arrived we were starving so we hit the open-air restaurant across the street.  Most places are open-air in Cabo.  The best part of the meal was the cook making guacamole at our table.  The rest of the food was mediocre and the service pretty slow.  We must remember we are on Mexico time.  

The hotel is lovely and we like it a lot.  

Silver Star Cemetery

With my walking every day I have to find amusements. So I watched for about a week as one of the neighbors put up this Halloween display.  He added stuff every day.  You can tell it is a labor of love.  The display gave me a reason to have a conversation with him.  He is part of a group of people in the PNW who go all out.  It is just a cool thing.  And I like his dog also.  He calls it Silver Star Cemetery and you can find him on facebook and other places.  
 

Bubble Run

 

One of the activities that was on my calendar that made my trip planning difficult was the Bubble Run.  I signed up for it back in July.  That gave me three months to get my walking up to speed.  In July most walks were at the mile level and a couple of them a day.  The Bubble Run was a 5K which means 3.11 miles give or take.  

By the time it was Bubble day I was consistently walking three miles once a day all at one time.  And so it was.  I walked the whole thing because as I say....I don't run unless I am attached to a leash that is also attached to Betsy.  Betsy runs, I run.  We don't run beyond the one time we proved we could do it.  I noticed my competitive streak came out a bit and I passed a lot of walkers.  I even passed some runners when they slowed down to walking.  

It is weird walking through bubbles.  There were five bubble machines along the route.  There was a wide variety of people participating.  Young, old, runners, walkers, costumed, etc.  One boy wanted to know why there were a couple of women running in wedding dresses.  His mom couldn't come up with a good reason, so I interjected because they were being fun.  And that is what it is all about.  It was fun. 

It was also a lot different than just walking around the neighborhood.  I think it was the competitive edge that made it so much more of a work out.  I'm glad I did it.  I completed that goal.  And that felt good.   

Perfect

 I was downtown looking in the shops.  Stopped at Kindred Homestead Supply.  I just love that shop.  I found the absolute perfect card for Brenda and Dave, just as a token of thanks for all their hospitality.  It has a bear on the cover. Hahahahahaha  I wrote I found the bear in it.  The card itself is one of those seed cards so Brenda can plant it in the spring and it should grow flowers.  She said she had never seen one of them before.  How cool is that?  I found something unique that she really liked.  

Since I was downtown on First Friday there were activities going on.  Kindred has a downstairs that they use for classes.  Also there is space to use for art.  So artists hang out there.  And there is The Blooming Wand.  So Emily was showing her space. I got a treat and got to experience a sound bath.  Wow is about all I can say.  I don't believe I have ever been so aware of how tense my body is all over.  That told me I need to do more body scans and learn to relax muscles.  I'd really be interested in getting a tarot reading from her as we had the most delightful conversation.  

Kindred also had a hidden courtyard.  I just thought that was so cool.  They use that space for classes also.  They do fabric dying out there amongst other things. Emily had told me that she did the mural in the courtyard.  It really was just a perfect couple of hours seeing, learning, breathing.  

The Concert That Wasn't

 I purchased all in tickets to see The Kings Of Leon back in July.  So excited.  I like to see two concerts a year for sure.  And was really looking forward to it, especially after last year when we could see none.  Jodi went with me to see The Black Crowes, so I thought I would invite my friend Doug to see The Kings of Leon.  

Doug usually takes me to one a year.  The last one we saw was Lynyrd Skynyrd in 2019.  I was so happy that this time it was my treat.  And so we made our arrangements.  He picked me up and off we went.  But it all felt wrong as soon as we got off the freeway.  We got all the way to the parking lot.  And that is when we found out the concert had been cancelled.  Their Mom had died so they cancelled all of their concerts in Oct.  So while we were disappointed, you can't really complain about that.

Since we were out and about we went ahead and had dinner.  Doug still got out of his house and doing something.  It was a nice dinner with great company.  We did the catch up thing we always do.  And who knows maybe The Kings of Leon will come back next year.  

Two Days

 

I went home with some rainbow eggs, strawberry jam and some of those delicious cookies.  The cookies did not make it home.  

Stopped at Painted Canyon in North Dakota.  Amazing.  The bison were not at the view area, but I had seen them from the interstate.  As I was leaving another Kia Soul came in that I had passed earlier in the day.  That one was pulling a trailer and I wondered how far it was going.  Remember I had had a conversation with Brenda's dad about what could a Soul pull.  

In Montana I came up on what I believed looked like a box in the middle of the interstate.  It was not. It was four 2x4s that must have been taped together because they were stacked perfectly.  I entertained thoughts for about 30 seconds of stopping and putting them in my car.  But I figured they would be too long.  I know I can only hold something that is 8 feet long.  And we are cruising at 80 in Montana so kind of dangerous even with the low amount of traffic.  On my way I kept going.  About a mile more and there was another stack of four perfectly stacked 2x4s right in the middle of the interstate.  Quarter of a mile more and there was a guy on the side of the road re-securing his load of lumber.  I wondered if he went back and picked up what he lost. 

Did my mountain passes on day 2.  No problem.  Going over the last one just before Coeur d'Alene and I see that Kia Soul stopped just before the top broke down.  Guess that is how far he was going.  Made me wonder if it was engine trouble or transmission.  Either way, it made me so glad that I had changed my mind on hauling a trailer.

I stopped at the Silver Dollar place and bought Pat a mug for his soda.  He was so happy.  Said he always wanted to stop there but the parents never would.  So at least he got a souvenir.  

I was home by dinnertime of the second day.  When I met up with Terri for lunch we talked about how we drive hard.  And it was funny because we both say Dad was a long haul truck driver and we learned all the tricks to get us where we wanted to be in a timely fashion. 

Minnesota Ramblings

 I'm ready to be home and sleep in my own bed.  I have had a marvelous time.  I got to spend a whole day with my sister and go shopping. All caught up on all the goings on with her family.  Nine grandchildren is a lot to keep up with.  

I helped set up for the surprise birthday party for my cousin.  She was totally surprised.  We had a family dinner out, family dinner in, went to church to hear my namesake preach, visited with lots of cousins and caught up.  I did get told who my family was and I disagreed.  Bloodlines, yes, family no.  Besides being annoying it was a bit amusing.  But that will be a story for another day.  

I managed to get in all my walks.  Dave tried to make me nervous by telling me one of the roads I take has bear sightings.  Maybe so but I didn't see any and it didn't stop me from walking down that road.  I figure if the bear hears me, I won't see him.  

Heading out of town I am going to stop in Milaca and get some of that expensive coffee Teresa made.  It was so good and it went delightfully with the gluton-free cookies her granddaughter made.  Taking some home to continue savoring the moments.  

Eight Days in Kokomo

 Eight glorious days in Kokomo.  I've got to say it feels like home.  One of mine anyway.  So it was eight days filled with football games and practices, a softball game, lunch out as grown-ups, lots of walks with and without children, laughter galore, shopping for things for the house, planning things for the house, meals, chores and homework.  I think Cassie likes the extra help especially now that the kids are getting into activities.  

Most of my goals were completed.  The furniture is now there.  We bought cubes for the kids' bedrooms and David got two of them put together.  The other set had to be exchanged due to a manufacturer defect.  Cassie picked out some paint color for the downstairs and new flooring for the downstairs bathroom.  The only thing not done was getting some shelving for the shed.  Shelves will make the storage much better for their camping and fishing equipment.  Unfortunately Sam's was out of the one we wanted.  We saw another set that would work, but naturally those were out also.  Going to keep an eye on it and they can pick up when it comes in stock.  

And now on to Minnesota with a quick stop in Illinois to see my aunt and uncle.  Just happy that I will be making it on time there.  

Made It

 What a ride.  What a sore butt.  The way the furniture had to be meant the seat could not shift or change.  I like to change my seating on long hauls because it makes my back and butt feel better. 

 I'm always amazed at how beautiful our country is.  I saw amazing sunsets and sunrises. 

Took a quick detour through Missouri to meet up with my friend Kim and meet the newest member of her family.  Gus, the colt.  Also Klaus who kind of liked me.  We had a great visit and caught up.  She always amazes me.  

Made it to Kokomo late last night.  So two and a half days of driving.  Nine states.  No mishaps.  Just lots of bugs especially in Nebraska. Dang you heard every one that hit the windshield.  Two hotels and then home.  

One More Time and Not Meant to Be

 The new injector did nothing to resolve my problem. Why am I not surprised?  And so Rick asked me how much more money I want to put into this vehicle.  It's now down to wiring or something is still wrong with the brain.  And wiring can become very expensive very fast when looking for the problem.  I told him I did not want to put anymore into it.  He understood.  He told me as his friend it was his recommendation also, but if I had just been any customer he would be happy to keep looking.  He charged me for my parts and not much of his labor.  And we parted ways.  He did recommend that if I ever buy another used vehicle I should pay him to come look at it first.  Good plan. 

Disheartening to say the least.  But I do have to say it feels like something just did not want me taking the mini van cross country.  So I'm looking at it and I'm looking at my car and I'm looking at it and I'm looking at my car.  I got my tape measure and measured the opening in the back and lo and behold the dresser will fit in my car.  Unbelievable.  I assumed it would not, hence all the other plans.  If I had bothered to check I could have been gone days to weeks ago and been in Kokomo in time to help my family move.  

So I moved the dresser and bed frames from the van to my vehicle.  Stuffed the extra spaces with whatever would fit.  Gathered my snacks, my backpack and my travel supplies.  Nita will have to come collect what she brought because none of that fit.  My priority is still the furniture Papa made.  Ready to go and I think I will leave today.  Get a good start.  My poor car.  No oil change, no tire rotation, no cleaning of fir needles, etc.  Bet I make it.  It feels right.  On my way family.  

Not Happening

 Oy.  So the harness was cancelled.  Turns out it is no longer available and that is why.  Would have been nice to know that before it was paid for.  Anyway the parts store ordered a better one and gave it to Rick for the same price as the one we ordered.  

Ha.  He installed it and it did not fix the problem. So tomorrow we will install a new injector because that is the code being thrown still.  Still missing.  Still broken.  

Road Trip Still Not Taken

 Oh my gosh.  Got the brain rebuilt and reinstalled.  It even came back early and that pumped me up. Worked great. Took the van to Dick's for tire rotation and rebalance.  That is where I found out that the bushings for the sway stabilizers were shot, gone, ridiculous.  One of them is held together with wire.  Why the f*** would you not just buy the right part and fix it. Dick's said $229 to replace both of them and it could wait until after the trip.  It is not a safety issue but it will clunk on occasion.  Okay so that is the plan. 

Loading all the furniture in the van was a chore.  I have bruises and tired muscles.  But I got it done.  Everything is in and all the small stuff hidden.  If you look in the windows you just see the dressers and bookcase.  I'm happy that I don't have to unpack at the other end and I don't envy the unpackers as it has to untetris the way out.  Again pumped to leave.

The day of leaving I needed to stop at Walmart for snacks and oil (oil leak you know) and flat fix.  Ready.  Start to pull out of the Walmart parking lot and it starts running like crap and here comes the check engine light again.  Home we go and part of the time that light is flashing...never seen that before on anything.  I assume it means it is a little more important than just a light. 

Rick comes back and puts the code reader on.  Fuel injector number one is throwing a code.  And he can't get to the plug to get it unplugged.  So he had to come back the following day and take the valve cover off.  We were hoping it was a fuel injector as that is easiest.  Nope it is the wiring.  And turns out to be the wire going to number six, but they all use the same ground so he tried to explain to me how it is shorting out from number six but reads as number one.  Bare wires.  Yeah bare wires are no good.  So he had to order a new wiring harness (because it was ridiculous to only fix number six), and of course it can't be here till today.  Fingers crossed.

For those keeping score; I was to leave Aug 9, Aug14, Aug 26, Sept 1, Aug 27 and again Sept 1. Today should be the tell.  If Rick is done in time I will go get an oil change and be on the road tomorrow.  I cancelled my flight to MN and the rental car.  I will already be in the Midwest and will just drive that way home.  I'm not making any firm plans at this point.  The road trip is still not taken.

The Trials and Tribulations of a Road Trip (Not Yet Taken)

 From the time Cassie was told they were approved for a mortgage I knew I was making a road trip.  Papa made beds and dressers for his grandchildren. Well let me rephrase that.  He made beds for the youngest two grandchildren.  He made one dresser and redid three dressers so that all his grandchildren had something special from him.  I have the dressers and beds for the ones I had for ten years.  And now that they have a more permanent place to live until they are grown up, it is time for them to have the furniture back.  And that means a road trip to deliver said furniture.

Easy peasey.  Not quite.  My first thought is naturally a U-haul.  A friend said I should be able to fit everything in a van.  Well guess what?  U-haul doesn't let you rent a van for a cross country trip. They are strictly for local. Damn.  So I move up to the smallest truck they have.  $4600.  Wait...what?  For eight days, are you crazy?  I've rented many small trucks locally and it is never more than $100 a day.  So I'm not renting a U-haul.   

I moved on to looking for a cheaper option for renting a truck.  Found Budget Trucks.  And the price while still high to me was much better than U-haul.  I could have a van, some packing blankets, roadside assist and tax for $2000.  Okay I make that reservation.  The next day I have email from them telling me that my car insurance does not cover rental trucks and I need to purchase theirs to the tune of about $600 because they estimate my trip taking like nine days.  U-haul never told me that, just asked who my insurer was for my car in those times I rented from them.  And it is a three day drive from here to Indiana.  Deal breaker for me, so I cancelled that reservation.  

Talking with our friend Dale we came up with the idea of me borrowing his trailer and having a hitch installed on my car.  Now I've never pulled a trailer.  But I'm willing to do it to get the furniture to Indiana.  Just knowing I can never back up.  Well I could not get a hitch installed until after the date I intended to be in Indiana.  So I changed my plans.  Then my brother said he could install the hitch.  So I cancelled the appt for that.  Saved me about $200 since I didn't have to pay for labor.  

My friend Brenda called me and put me on the line with her dad.  We talked about my experience in pulling a trailer.  We talked about how cars that aren't designed for towing can overheat their transmissions going up and down hills.  I have a really big mountain pass to go over.  We talked about how the trailer does not behave well when empty as opposed to full.  He thought maybe I should rent a pick-up to haul said trailer.  Or hey how about renting a toyota minivan.  He thought it sounded like my stuff would fit in that.  After this conversation I no longer wanted to pull a trailer.  

And all of that put me back to my original idea of buying a van, hauling the stuff and then selling the van.  And after my conversation with Brenda's dad I knew I could look at larger minivans.  First I looked at cargo vans and really opted out of that because I figure something used as a work van was probably used hard. 

I found a local minivan with only about 150,000 miles.  Price was right.  I went to see it and measured to see if the stuff would fit.  It will and just fits through the back hatch.  Took it for a little test drive.  Felt like a 20 year old vehicle.  They had kept pretty meticulous notes on when it was serviced.  New tires, brakes, etc.  So I ended up meeting them at the dmv and bought it.  Driving home the check engine light came on.  WTF.

Now I already have planned on having it looked at for issues that could come up on the trip.  And all the way home even though that light was on it drove fine.  Never sounded weird or anything.  I got in touch with a mobile mechanic who actually came the same day. Put the code reader on it and asked me how much I had driven the van and if I had done anything to it.  I drove it home and no I had not done anything to it.  Well someone (presumably the previous owners) had disconnected the battery and cleared all the codes.  While he was looking at the engine and telling me it has a little oil leak, but as long as I watch it it will be okay till I sell it, the code popped.  He looked it up and it said the brain of the vehicle was going and that is why they cleared the code before they put it up for sale.  A neighbor suggested I do the same thing.  Well that is not me.  So Rick, the mechanic, looked it up and made a call and I can get this one rebuilt and then it will be fine.  There were no new ones to be had and even so a new one would have to be programmed and he can't do that.  We were both pleasantly surprised when a rebuild only costs $340.  Two week turn around though.  Rick took the brain and it is being done.  I have no choice now but to fix it.  

I have been trying to fit this road trip in amongst planned things (that are all paid for).  I wanted to go early and be back in time for a concert I'm going to. Well that obviously didn't work since I'm still here.  Then I planned on leaving the day after the concert so I can go, have some time there with the kids and drive back all before my flight to MN in the middle of Sept.  If I can't make that work I have to wait until into Oct and be back in time for my trip to Cabo. Oy.  It's all going to be all right and I am going to get there.  I just don't know when.  Guess it will depend on when the brain gets back and hoping for no more issues.  I already know I am not going to recoup all of the outlay on this van, but I'm still pretty confidant that it will come in costing me a lot less than a U-haul. 

A House

 So the house in Indiana got bought.  And the family finally got the keys.  Once they were allowed to go in the house they discovered that the previous owners left quite the mess.  That kind of dampened their enthusiasm of being new home owners a bit.  

After that initial annoyance was over they got to work.  Cleaned up all the garbage.  The kids have all picked colors for their rooms to be painted.  I'm sure the previous people loved the colors they had painted.  But lime green is horrible and that room is now a brilliant red with black trim.  The orange room is becoming blue.  And on and on and on.  

Cassie had commented about how in the past they always lived in rentals and just didn't care much.  Well now it is theirs and she cares a lot.  A lot more thought and effort is going into making it their home.  I'm excited to get there and see all the Cassie touches.  

Perspective Shift

 I had a perspective shift.  Sometimes it is almost annoying to be making a call and having to push a number for English.  And it isn't that I think there shouldn't be a choice...I just think that I shouldn't have to for my language when my language is the language of the country.  Perhaps push a number for all the other languages. But it isn't a big annoyance or even an all the time annoyance.  I  have friends and relatives who are always annoyed and more by it.  The sentiment is if you come here you should learn the language.  

My dentist is Hispanic.  I'm not sure which country she is from but English is not her first language and she does pretty well.  However, I, at times, do not understand everything she tells me.  Like she gave me a prescription and I had no clue what it was for until I picked it up and the pharmacist told me.  I'm sure she told me but I didn't get it.  And as I sat there I realized just a little bit that this must be what someone goes through who does not understand my language completely.  It was an aha moment.  

Sometimes until you experience something yourself, you really do not have a good understanding.  As I experience more I am able to apply it to all of my life and go 'oh, so that is what that was about'. 

So now I understand better all the options on the phone.  All the options to read things in different languages.  It is inclusive and should be.  

Oy The Minibun

 And so I hit that goal.  So excited that it coincided with a trip to the mall.  Bought my minibun and took it home. After craving it for so long and not being able to get one.  And then hyping myself up with using it as a reward.  I've got to say I was rather disappointed.  

It tasted fine. Not quite the same as the cinnabon.  I think the dough is spread thinner for the mini and it changes it just a bit.  Or my tastebuds have just changed with all the new healthy food I am eating.  For two months I have eaten almost no sweet carbs.  The only exceptions have been pieces of birthday cake, twice. 

So it is what it is.  

MiniBun

 Getting so close to my reward of the minibun.  I am hovering at between 19 and 20 pounds lost.  Trying really hard to not be frustrated with the daily yo-yo and patiently waiting for the yo-yo to move under 20.  One of the hints of the program I am on is looking for other things to tell me that I am working the program successfully. 

They check my blood pressure at the dentist.  And I noticed that it is even better than it normally is.  I don't have high blood pressure to begin with.  Just a noticing.  Also my resting heart rate is back down.  This has to be due to the walking I am doing. 

My clothing fits so much better and goes on easier.  I can walk faster.  That 20 pounds is like carrying two ten pound bags of sugar.  What a picture.  My hips don't hurt as much.  My knees, on the other hand...actually I think I have some tendonitis going on again and at least walking does not bother it.  I'm starting to sleep better.  

I have many ways to tell me that this whole thing is working and making me healthier.  So glad I decided it was time to take care of me. 

Delicious Food

 Let me preface this with I am not an adventurous eater.  I tend to lean way on the picky side and usually don't like to try new things. I also don't like too much mixture of foods in one dish.  But I found this recipe on Natashaskitchen.com  for this Greek Salad.  I never ever would have added olives, avocado or feta cheese to a salad.  I doubt I ever would have tried a lemon dressing.  And yet I did it to follow the recipe and it was so delicious.  And easy.

I made it the way Natasha did and it was so gorgeous.  I ate it for three days.  Granted the first day was the best, but it remained edible until it was gone.  This is how I change habits and keep on my new journey.  Almost 16 pounds gone.  

Social Much

 On the introvert/extrovert scale, I lean introvert.  I can be social when I have to be, like working.  But mostly I consider myself to be shy and more quiet.  So lately I have found myself having all these conversations with people in my neighborhood park.  And that just feels odd to me.  

The best conversations have come during this nice heat wave we have been having.  Maybe we feel a kinship as we are the only people out walking before the heat really comes.  We have been talking about the heat (obviously), pets (obviously) and food. I've met some great dogs.  I even got this one guy who sits outside all the time to converse.  He had his cat out on a leash one day before the heat and that gave us an opening.  

Maybe some more changes are afoot.  

Caught In a Loop

 Oy.  While I was in Indiana I got a message from Rose about meeting up and seeing JJ.  She is getting so big. Almost a year and a half old now.  It's been several months again since I have seen her. I didn't think it through and said something to Jodi about it.  

And the storm has begun.  Jodi and Rose don't have a great relationship.  So she doesn't see JJ as much as she would like.  And each of them will give you reasons why and they don't match up.  I always figure there are three sides to every story.  The third side is the truth which is somewhere in the middle.  

So when I opened my mouth, I think Jodi felt a lot of jealousy.  Because I was going to get to see JJ and she isn't.  Now at the time I commented that I  had a message and I said yes, but no specific plan was made.  I did comment that my grandchildren were here so it would be wonderful to meet this upcoming week or two as that way my ginger girl could chase JJ around park. A park was the offer and one that works great.  But that was as far as it went.  I left the ball in Rose's court. It's her child and her plan.  I'm just really open to it.  

Yesterday the kids and I went to a movie.  I bought the tickets last week.  I walk out of the movie theater to Jodi messaging me and asking if I was seeing JJ today at a park.  And more.  I said no of course as I was not.  But then I was afraid I had a miscue with Rose.  So I messaged her and asked.  Nope I was good.  

I am feeling very much caught in the middle and need to extricate myself.  I like Rose.  And I like Jodi.  And I love JJ. I think that children need all the people in their lives who will just love them.  Unfortunately for all the relationships I think I am going to have to learn to keep my mouth shut and keep every one compartmentalized.  

Quick Trip to Indiana

 I made a quick trip to Indiana.  Timed it to be there for David's birthday.  That way, again, Cassie and David could go out if they chose to celebrate.  And they did that my last night.  Soon they won't need a babysitter.  The kids are growing up so fast.  

They are buying a house.  So I got a showing of the house they put an offer on that was accepted.  I am so excited for them.  I'm also happy that it will provide another layer of stability for my grandkids.  Each kid will have a bedroom and it is yet to be decided which one is sharing their room with me.  

I'm going to have to make another road trip.  This time in a U-haul. Once they have actually moved (and I assume it will go go according to Hoyle) I will bring the kids' furniture to them.  Part of that is exciting.  The big kids should have the beds and dressers that Papa made for them.  I'm not looking forward to getting them down from upstairs to be loaded into a U-haul.

While there I continued on my walks.  Took kids each time.  The boys and I went on an overly ambitious walk and did between three and four miles.  I was surprised the littlest one did the whole thing by himself without complaint.  

I kept up my Noom program and when I got home had lost two more pounds.  No scale while I was there to tell me.  Kind of nice to get a big jump.  It is harder to stay on program when you aren't at home. 

The big kids came home with me.  They will spend a couple weeks with me.  Then they go to Nana Nita's with the rest of the family.  The rest arrive just in time to go camping with us on the island.  Then north and then back to us for a night before returning home.  I take the big kids home a couple of days later.  I still don't have a ticket to ride to get back home.  Maybe I should look into that.  

Pretty Food

One of Noom's suggestions is to make your food pretty.  Kind of like presentation is everything.  I think all the new food I have been making is colorful and pretty.  But tonight I purposely made my little cucumber and radish side pretty.  I don't know if it made me feel better about the food but I did enjoy eating it.  And notice how neat my asparagus spears are.  Hard to make salad by itself look pretty and brusssel sprouts just kind of go wherever.  It was a lovely vegetarian meal.  
 

Number Eight

 

Still going strong.  Trying new foods.  Trying new cooking.  It is kind of fun again.  Especially the roasting and stir frying of vegetables.  My friend Belinda told me about cabbage steaks and she was right.  They are very tasty. And turns out good for you with few calories.  One of those wonderful low calorie dense foods.  

Noom has been teaching me a whole lot of things.  Like how some of our habits got that way.  And why we do a lot of the things we do.  Like social norms in dining with other people.  There is so much more involved than just counting the calories. 

So about two weeks in the program talked about how the scale should not be your only reference to your success.  The timing was perfect because the day of it, I gained a pound.  I was like wait...what? Seriously I am following the program and not cheating.  So I took a breath and followed what the program said.  Success comes from enjoying all the greens.  Success comes from how many days did I walk.  Success comes from continuing to follow the program and not jumping ship at the first swell.  Success comes from how I feel so far.  All those things were good.  So I continued on.

I am now at eight pounds down.  I'm looking forward to my cinnabon one day.  Wait...not a cinnabon because I looked it up and it is 850 calories.  Then I looked up the minibon and it is only 350.  Still a lot for a treat, but doable once in a rare while. When I decide it is time and worth it.  Maybe when I hit magic number 20.  

Reason Why

 It struck me the other day.  I have been the caretaker for a long time.  Pretty much all of my adult life.  The caretaker doing such a good job, sometimes forgets to take care of herself.  After a year of COVID and a year without kids I am finally taking care of me.  

So I knew I wanted to eat better and actually decided it was time to lose the weight that I have carried for almost 25 years.  I know some basics and I know me.  So I knew I needed help.  I've been seeing these ads for Noom and decided I would try it.  

So I have been using the program for two weeks, which is the free trial period.  In that two weeks I lost five pounds and am eating a lot of good food.  The surprise was getting rid of so much junk and processed food...I was amazed at how good 'real' food tastes.  So I am logging my meals and watching where it falls on the calorie denseness indicator.  I am walking almost every day.  Sometimes by myself and sometimes with a friend or dogs.  Noom gives me lots of tips on how to get past the cravings and the fog eating.  

Here is the link if anyone is interested in trying it themselves.  No hidden agenda.  If you click my link, and you like it and stick with it, I get something out of it.  I personally like the program as it works for me right now.  I'm one of those people that if I pay for it, I am going to use it.

Watch my journey.  

Still At It

 Still eating lots of veggies and salads.  I think my favorite salad is the 50/50 mix which has baby spinach in it.  And then just a very small amount of Olive Garden light Italian put on the salad in drops.  I am absolutely in love with roasted Brussel sprouts with garlic and parmesan.  And then one night I added in the last of the asparagus and it made it very edible.  I'm not a fan of asparagus, but I'm trying to get a good variety of veggies in.  Although it seems I like green veggies best.  

This week brought up a visit with Dennis, one of our forever neighbors.  A trip to farmer's market with a walk downtown.  That took us into a couple of stores and we noticed many new restaurants.  Society lamented the loss of so many small businesses during the pandemic.  And I am empathetic.  But I knew we would see a whole bunch of new businesses when we could come back together.  

My big project was cleaning up and reorganizing my food storage.  Now that most things have moved back upstairs it was getting messy.  Looks so much better and I did not procrastinate for months.  Makes me happy.

A Week

 Today marks a week since I returned home from Indiana.  And what a week it has been.  Maybe I finally shed that seasonal depression.  I feel better and it shows.  

First I found my motivation back for my little garden.  And so I bought and hauled the dirt.  I bought the plants and cages and then got it planted and watered.  Looks nice.  I'm happy.  I haven't had a garden with veggies since 2012.  And always before that I had an awful lot of help.  Dave liked to help get the plot ready for planting. And he liked to plant.  So this was all on me this time.  Hence a small raised bed.  I have five tomatoes, a cucumber, a zucchini and some pole beans.  

Before working on the garden...I had to mow as it had not been done since I did it before going to Indiana.  I also got frustrated with my weed eater as it wouldn't spin.  Argh.  Pat let me use his cordless though and I got some of that done and now you can see the garden.  Along with that I weeded the front flowerbeds and got it all in the yard recycle and out.  

While Jodi and I were in Hawaii we talked about better eating.  I think I actually started there.  Got back in the grove of being aware when I was full and not eating more.  A lot of it is just being aware.  So I continued on in Indiana.  When I got home I had to go grocery shopping and I bought lots of veggies and good for me food.  Took three stores to get it all.  I really don't like that part. 

Now that I am home for an extended period....well until the middle of June anyway...I am seriously working on it.  Getting more veggies in and leaving the junk at the store.  Drinking more water.  Had a nice salad last night (and I don't believe I have ever had just salad as a main course) with an avocado.  The grape tomatoes I put on it were so dang sweet.  It feels good to be taking care of myself.  And a lot easier when I am just taking care of me.  

My social life increased.  I talked to a couple of neighbors, visited my friend Doug and made it out to Betty's.  I had went to check on Mom's headstone and then stopped at Betty's on the way back.  I'm going to mow for her later in the week.  And a side note....the headstone is not there yet.  Oy.  I'm making plans with Brenda and Belinda to meet up.  We last saw each other last fall.  Too long but every one was staying home and away from people as much as possible.  Every one but me.  

And I am now vaccinated for the COVID.  I was beginning to feel like I had more than tempted fate the last year.  I did a lot of travelling.  And so I opted to get the shots.  The first one before I went to Hawaii and it gave me a headache and a sore arm.  The second shot, day after I returned from Indiana, gave me a headache, a worse sore arm and joint pain.  Felt it for a couple of days and then it all dissipated. 

It feels good to be past the fog.  

Indiana

 Every trip to Indiana, my anxiety lessons and my depression decreases.  I feel it happening as it gets closer to time to go.  And it is so nice.  Honesty says there are times that my PTSD get a bit triggered, but seems to be less and less each trip.  

Then we do the reverse the other direction.  I've got to say that this is the first year that my seasonal depression really continued on past the winter.  Maybe it didn't and situational depression kicked in.  I really don't know.  I just know that it is so.  

Part of it has to be that big pieces of my heart are in Indiana, and when I am with them, I feel more whole. 

This trip was suppose to end and Pat and Rebecca were going to Hawaii.  I was going to have a week to myself at home.  Well plans always change and now I will not be by myself and Pat is going alone.  So all my well intentioned plans (that I would only get half done if lucky) are out the window.  And my anxiety is surging.  Wonderful.  

A Little Progress

 I'm a fixer in the co-dependent realm.  Many years ago I learned to ask myself who I was actually helping when I wanted to fix something.  And that helps me to sometimes not try to fix someone's world.  Then I learned to say "That sucks" as an act of sympathy but not to fix.  That is a great one.

But I still find myself trying to fix things.  I interject advice when none was asked for.  I add my experiences in a conversation that was not about my experiences.  Hindsight says that can be a bit judgmental although that was never the intention.  It is surely how it feels when it happens to me.  

So I am working on my next step.  Not interjecting so much.  Listening for understanding not for my response.  Once in awhile I am successful.  But boy can I tell this is a hard one to make a new habit in my world.  I think it is progress just to acknowledge that I have this issue.  Because once I acknowledge it then I instinctively start to work on it. 

I'm making a little progress.  

The Boys

 For three days Jodi and I watched the boys across the street.  We are pretty sure they are homeless.  They aren't there first thing, but they show up and hang out all day.  Anyone still sleeping at around 6 are rousted and told to move on.  Jodi witnessed this when she went for coffee one morning.  So we watched their comings and goings and fights and whatnot.  

On our last night we decided we would go talk to the older Hawaiian gentleman.  On the way we passed a different group.  One of them had a guitar and looked like he was going to play so I stopped.  Jodi was a bit ahead of me.  One of the group just started yelling at her like "what are you looking at?" Well she said we just stopped to see if the other guy was going to play and listen to him.  Turns out he had just broken a string.  Well the yelling guy then totally changed his tune and got out guitar strings for the first guy.  We never heard any playing.  Instead they told us part of their stories.  One moved out to the islands from Virginia after his divorce.  Said wife got everything....maybe, maybe not.  The other one, with the guitar, told us how his family was involved in the founding of Horizon Air and A Thousand Trails.  Told us he modeled in his youth and he was so appreciative when I told him he still could do that.  He had a great look.  Life obviously played a cruel trick on these guys.  Alcohol can take all the life out of you.

We moved on to the group we originally wanted to talk to.  The older Hawaiian gentleman told us his name and it ended in Junior.  I told him that is what I was going to call him.  Not even trying to mess up his given name.  He is 62 and had never been married.  He offered to give me the necklace off his neck when I commented how beautiful it was.  I did not accept.  I did end up with a lei from one of the other guys and it turned out Junior had made it.  Junior was a gentle soul.  

I noticed that these guys are very jealous.  They would push each other out of the way so they could talk to us and tell us their stories. George, the original yeller, followed us.  He had been told by the ambassadors to stay on his side of the street.  He did not when he followed us.  The last morning we saw him on our side of the street talking to some people.  More sober in the morning.  He was talking to a couple.  The man was engaged and conversed. The woman was very uncomfortable and facilitated their exit as quickly as she could.  She spent the two minutes he was near them pretending he didn't exist.  

I can't even fathom their life.  To be ignored, yelled at, looked down upon, etc.  They made choices that got them there and it is sad.  Jodi and I treated them like humans and listened to their stories.  It took so little time.  No one was panhandling.  Junior told us the ambassadors keep a pretty tight reign on things because it might hurt the tourism and it is what runs the island.  We enjoyed our time with the boys who were all in their later 50's and early 60s.  It was a pleasure to meet George, Kuolt, Joe, Joe and Junior.  Down on their luck but not out yet.  

Sunburns

 This story starts in 2005.  We went to Maui and took Josh with us as company for Mike.  When we got there I told Josh he should use sunscreen.  The sun is different in Hawaii.  I have gotten the worst sunburn ever there.  Well he informed me that since he is bi-racial he doesn't burn and doesn't need to use sunscreen. I told him he should anyway but he refused.  You can't argue with 15 year-olds.

A couple days later he was trying to figure out why his skin hurt.  He had never experienced it before.  Yup, he got a sunburn.  I kind of laughed in my head.  No one ever believes me.  Some people have to learn the hard way.

So I told Jodi this story, probably for the fourth time over the years.  Then I bought sunscreen and recommended she use it.  The sun is different in Hawaii.  She refused telling me she does not burn.  I said, "Okay, Josh."  Hoping she was right.  

By day three she had a nice sunburn going on.  I kind of laughed in my head and now I see where Josh got it.  Some people have to learn it for themselves.  Now I have to tell Josh the story of his mom doing the same thing as him in Hawaii.

Caroline

 Jodi and I walk past this store more times than we should, but it is on the block past our hotel.  Every time we are accosted by the salespeople.  They are selling expensive skin products.  We know this because we did go in once.  Only $299 for a two year supply of this stuff that is better than botox.  It's not really.  It just dries on your skin and pulls it tighter so the wrinkles look smaller.  Anyway they do and say all kinds of things to get you to engage so they can try to sell their product.  And there are more than one shop selling the same stuff but all with different names.  But mostly we just passed this one.

So our second night we are walking through trying to get to the shops we want to shop in and the guy looks at me and says "Are you following me?"  I ignore him but it made me kind of upset.  That felt beyond the normal ploy of trying to get my attention.  We walk by and go shop.  

First shop there is this older woman shopping.  We discussed some little thing and went about our business.  Second shop this woman again came in behind us.  I turned to her and said "are you following us?"  Then I asked her if that guy on the previous block had tried that with her also and he had.  So we had quite the little discussion about pressure sales.  Went about our business again.

This morning we are walking on the sidewalk going the other way and we ran into her again.  We laughed.  Her name is Caroline and they were getting ready to leave the hotel and go stay in an airbnb.  She lives in Arizona.  She almost felt like a friend at this point.  

Laugh?

 So I happened to eavesdrop on a conversation between parent and child.  They seemed to be discussing how much work the child should be doing around the household.  I came in as the child said she works.  And the mother laughed at her.  And then went on a tirade of all the things she does and what her work hours were.  

All of that might have meant something if the mother ran a household and was raising a family.  It might have meant more if she hadn't just started a job (second week) after more than a year being unemployed.  It might have meant more if the daughter was babysitting and not working at a grocery store collecting a real paycheck. 

I looked back over my life and I do not recall my mother ever laughing at me and trying to make me feel small.  I come from my own alcoholic family with all of its co-dependencies.  We had all our own trails and tribulations.  But Mom never purposely tried to make us feel small.

Later I said something to the girl about seeing her job and how it hurt my feelings for her when her mom laughed.  She looked at me like she did not understand the last part.  And that is when I realized that she has coping mechanisms in place to protect herself.  It's a good thing for her to not be hurt by things like this.  It is also a sad thing that she has to have those coping mechanisms in the first place.  

It truly makes me appreciate what a good mom I had.  She worked hard to try and minimize the damage that we suffer in a broken family.  

Garden

 Last fall we started talking about a garden here.  I'm not sure what anyone else envisioned, but I just want a space to grow some grazing food.  I like to go out and just pick a mater and eat it.  Or a cucumber.  Or beans off the vine.  

We don't have a rototiller.  I don't want to pay someone to come rototill a small space for a grazing garden.  So I decided that a raised bed or two would be good.  Roommate loved the idea and thought we needed four four by eight beds.  Well that is a lot of garden space.  And she said she had a friend who could get us the lumber for cheap and we could build them ourselves.  

Time moved on and it was getting time to start some process.  I've heard nothing more from the household except dismay when I thought about buying a house in Indiana because we were going to have a garden.  Someone on Facebook was looking for raised beds and some woman said she made them.  So I messaged her and asked for the price.  $80 for two three by sixes.  Perfect.  I bought two.  That could still be one too many but we will see. 

So I have been mowing and getting ready for the beds.  Pat said I needed to make sure to round up by the fence because we won't be able to mow or weed eat once the garden grows.  So yesterday I did that and moved the last sheet of plywood.  Beds are in place and now waiting for dirt. Planting will have to wait until after the next trip to Indiana.  But I'm ready to rock.  And obviously the garden is mine.